No I haven't forgotten you

Well lets see. I'm still employed at the same place, despite being given my one days notice, twice. I've taken up table tennis during my breaks, which means I inhale my food and as a result spend about 10 of my 10 and a half at hours at work on my feet. When I started I could barely stand long enough to make it to my breaks. I guess my improved endurance is some trade off for spending time at a place that gives me no new skills, or anything that would remotely make me more employable, well except for more of the same.

I grow tired of searching for work relevant to my degree. With my experience not really backing up my degree good work appears unobtainable, making the search doomed from the beginning. If I took an 'anything' job I think the interview would flop as I couldn't convince myself I wanted the job, let alone an interviewer.

So, being that I could count the times I've left the house for social purposes in the last 7 months on one hand, hell I could add Wellington visits combined with job interviews on the same hand. I don't really see the point of it all. I've traded so much of my life to become a certified shut-in who has saved a few grand in the process. I'm not sure how long I'm meant to do this, there isn't an arbitrary number I'm aware of that I'm trying to save to. Nothing better is coming along. And who knows perhaps I'll get something else and look back at what I do now with fondness.

I miss university.

Another month down

Well and there goes July. Not a lot has happened over the last month. To summarise..

Had a job interview in Wellington, I remain doubtful on the result after waiting to hear back, but you'll hear if I do get it. Hell I probably wouldn't shut up about it.

I also became an Uncle, well I sort of already was, but this requires less explaining for the family connection. It's a girl and it seems to be doing fine.

I've was also told that I was having my last day at work last week. Then they kept telling me to come in. I think that this week will be the end of it. Now I'm back at square one. I'll re-evaluate my position in a few weeks if nothing happens.

I've outlasted a few at work and on the note of 'outing' a forklift driver on his last day asked if I was looking for a gay friend and gave me his number. By far the most awkward thing that happened that morning. Lots of South American girls there and I get the 45 year old male fork lift driver hitting on me. If there is a God I like his sense of humour.

I also got a PS3 which makes explanation as to why I don't write here much these days.



As you can see I just finished inFamous today. Going to sell it and get something else.

I miss thinking

It's July? How sneaky Mr Calendar! I honestly didn't see it coming. At work we work with ISO dates and I can tell you off hand that it's the 27th week of the year or 09.27.6 (being a Saturday). I can also tell you I've spent 4/924 of my life at my job, assuming I get to age 77. I don't have a lot to show for the last 4 months. On one hand I have an improved financial situation and on the other I have lost my dreams and aspirations. On the third hand (?) the last 4 months wont be a waste if the unlikely happens and I get the trainee coolstore managers job. I could at least use that to climb a few rungs in the future if need be, which would be easy with my three hands I guess.

I'm almost prepared to take bets on which happens first: Me having a successful job interview that leads to a job, or the All Blacks winning another world cup. Both of us at one stage were 1 from 1.

I moved

Well a lot has happened. I've left Wellington and made the move home. I also saw the All Blacks play on another wet All Black game (my third consecutive wet All Black game). I hoped to find someone to fill my room to cover my rent obligation. But nobody has come yet and at this point I'll let it sit empty and not pay rent. I've paid so many bills in my absence for that flat that I'll let them take it from my tab.

So now the question points to what now? So far it is just carry on doing what I'm doing. I think work has slowed down and I may actually start seeing full weekends. Which will make no difference to my net income as my rent works out to be over a days wage. So I guess I end out ahead. I wont dwell on how much I could of saved if I left earlier as that would be like asking a lifetime lotto player how much they would of saved if they had never played (assuming no major wins). I guess we just hope for great things to happen so the gamble doesn't seem as great.

Given the shaft much?

It's been a test of a week. I tried to negotiate a peaceful solution to the conflict in my flat, but really I think I've just been spit in the face by my approach of fairness. It turns out I've been paying my share of rent and expenses only to find that this has been used to pay minor bills that aren't in my name while over $600 has been run up in my name with electricity and a $290 phone bill. I tried ringing the phone company on Friday night to get toll calls suspended only to find out it's been done by default and that the collections department will contact me this week.

This really means I've spent a 60 hour week paying for my flat mates utilities. A is for awesome. I think I might just cut it off completely on Monday and bite the bullet and front up the cash. I really want to take my flatmate to court, I want to know what she's done with the money she's been entrusted to pay bills with.

I've also heard no news on the job front, but then again that's not surprising as I'm sure I'm putting applications into a black hole never to be heard from again. This of course still leaves me clinging to my temporary solution which has an unknown length to it as it stands. Already the main season is over and I feel on borrowed time.

At this point I'm over Wellington and am giving it till the end of the month. And if I take away Wellington there isn't too many places in New Zealand I really want to be.

So I guess I should just make one final stand with a massive application send off but I just can't do it. I read the job descriptions and I'm either over qualified or lack experience. It really feels a futile exercise and I can feel myself starting to rot on the inside, all I feel like doing now is going to sleep, I seriously would go to sleep by 7:30 every night if I wasn't going to wake up at some stupidly early hour in the morning. I still can't work out if the big mistake was going to university or leaving it.

Fuck I'm jaded right now.

99 Led Balloons fall down

We got thrashed. It was unprecedented. We even scored first, not that I knew that at the time as I started watching the game at 4am, 20 minutes after kick off. At that stage we were down about 31-7, which eventually come to a halt at 61 - 17. The Bulls deserved it and I firmly believe not even the All Blacks could of beaten them there on that day. It reminded me of that All Black game from the end of season tour of 2006 against France, except we were on the side of dominance.

It's Queens birthday and it marks the 13th (day) anniversary since I had to get up and go to work. Instead I have to mediate a dispute from my flat that I haven't seen in months. I hate drama.

Still, I'm in no hurry I can enjoy my morning a bit I guess.

No, I'm not dead

Thanks to the Queen I get this Monday off. It's not far away, just a weekend and then a paid day off. But having just completed my 10th consecutive day at work it is something I'm looking forward to, despite having no plans whatsoever. I'm hoping I'll just be basking in the glory of a Chiefs Super 14 title win. But I wont hold my breath.

The season comes to a close pretty soon and I'm in a nice position to deal with that. My credit card has gone from red to black and now Visa owes me 15 cents. I've also made some decent headway into my savings account which will allow me to carry on with my life plan of stall, stall and stall some more.

With the main kiwifruit season coming to a close I'm considering moving back down to Wellington in the hope I can stay down there and actually live in the flat I've been paying rent to. I've been here for 11 weeks now and working for 10 and a half of those. In that time I've been to Wellington for less than 24 hours and seen my friends once. Amazing when you consider how you get more time off on an oil rig or in the mines.

I may not be dead but this isn't exactly living either.